Some People have the art of hitting you with dark humor and jokes when you are trying to get them at. People tend to suffer when they are unable to reply with some wittiest replies. In today’s world you do not need just to be highly intelligent at your field of expertise but one has to be good at dark humor. People like those who are good at both on the shop floor with their skill and outside with their witty and roasting skills. In a pool of friends, you have to be on the receiving end if you do not know how to roast your common enemy or sometimes your best friends. In this post, you will find good roasts that you can utilize when you are taking jab at your enemy or your best friend.
Good Roasts
Whoever told you to be yourself, gave you a bad advice.
I don’t know what makes you so stupid, but it works.
Have a nice day… somewhere else.
You are like a software update. every time I see you, I immediately think “not now”.
You hear that? It’s the sound of me not caring.
I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.
I treasure the time I don’t spend with you.
You see that door? I want you on the other side of it.
I can’t wait to spend my whole life without you.
I look at you and think what a waste of two billion years of evolution.
Good Roasts for friends
You do realize we tolerate you.
You deserve to be loved… from a distance
I’m busy right now; can I ignore you another time?
You bring everyone so much joy! You know, when you leave the room. But, still.
Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons?
Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go.
I’d slap you but I don’t want to make your face look any better.
You’re impossible to underestimate.
Don’t worry, the first 40 years of childhood are always the hardest.
You fear success, but you really have nothing to worry about.
Good Roasts for enemy
The last time I saw something like you, it was behind metal grids.
You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job.
I’m jealous of people that don’t know you!
You should really come with a warning label.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all stupid people.
You are proof that evolution can go in reverse.
I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral.
Are you at a loss for words, or did you exhaust your entire vocabulary?
Last time I checked you were average and I was Awesome.
Also Read: Attitude Status in English